Back when Bush was in office, one quiet Christmas, an animated TV show took the world by storm. It’s nearly 18 years later, and Bush is still in office– oh wait, it’s only Junior. Still, “The Simpsons” have outlasted quite a few shows, and seems set to keep on cruising. I’m looking forward to July 27, and “The Simpsons Movie.” It’s just surprising they waited so long to make it, really.

The Simpsons marketing machine has been roaring steady for several years, but this latest marketing move is kind of a neat one. For this month only, the Kwik-E-Mart will live, not just on our television screens and in our imaginations, but at eleven (11) different 7-11s nationwide. These lucky stores (one of which is a brief ride away from me!) will carry such delightful, nutritious goodies as Buzz Cola, Krusty-O’s, and Squishees. No Duff Beer, unfortunately, nor any Flaming Moe’s. No nacho hats, no five-alarm chili. Butterfingers have reportedly existed before July 1, 2007, or so I’m told. I suspect they’ll still be easy to find after July 31, too.

So where exactly can you find Buzz Cola? How can you get your grubby hands on a box of fortified breakfast sugar, aka Krusty-O’s? Dare you drink a Squishee? Go to any (or all!) of these eleven “Kwik-E-Marts.” When you do, say hello to Apu for me!

As for me? ¡Ay, caramba! It’s off to Venice Boulevard for me! No Kwik-E-Mart near you? Too bad. Eat my shorts, dude.

One of the foundations of our society is that we are a nation of laws. However, as I’ve stated elsewhere, this is the ideal; the reality is there has always been at minimum a two-tier system in this country. This painful reality has never been more true than today.

Smirk has decided that the serious felony of perjury doesn’t matter. He has decided that a prosecutor, judge, and jury don’t know what they are doing, and that he knows best. He has decided that going to prison is “harsh punishment.” If that’s so, let’s empty our prisons. There’s more than 2 million currently incarcerated in federal and state prisons. We certainly would save a lot of money by doing so. We can just convict and fine everyone. Today, the “President” commuted the sentence of Irving L. Libby. Libby was convicted of perjury, and sentenced to 30 months in prison; a sentence in the mid-range of sentencing guidelines. Apparently, it’s okay to lie nowadays; you just need to know the right people.

I don’t feel that the commutation will necessarily “punish” Libby. He’s well-off, and in any event, his defense fund will most likely help to cover the cost of the fine. Just like Wolfowitz, he’ll probably end up at some cushy job somewhere, so even if he were disbarred, it wouldn’t mean a whole lot. So there’s no real punishment. Hey, even Paris Hilton went to jail. Libby doesn’t have to. While I think DUI is a serious crime, so is perjury.

It isn’t just Libby. Lately, we’ve had Scowl/Shooter claim that he’s essentially a fourth branch of government, which is contrary to what just about every American learned in high school civics (except, apparently, for Cheney and his buddies). [In case you missed all that, you can read about it here and here. There’s also a pretty good WaPo series on the head of the CIA the Vice-President (registration req’d)] We’ve had very little oversight in general; the committees in the House and the Senate are just barely scratching the surface, and this administration is determined to run out the clock so they can escape scot-free. Ideally, I’d like to see them sent before a judge, so the adults can administer the appropriate punishment. Realistically, I know that’s not all that possible, given the current configuration of the government. Still, I’ve already made the rounds, including banging out the following letter to Madam Speaker:

Dear Speaker Pelosi:

I am livid about the commutation of Irving L. Libby’s sentence by the President. The appeals process had yet to be fully completed, and Libby was convicted of a serious crime: perjury. This is further proof that there are two systems of justice in this country. One for the rich and powerful, and one for everyone else. It is clear the President doesn’t REALLY respect the jury’s verdict. It is also painfully obvious that this administration believes it is above the law. I urge the following three actions.

1) finding equivalent cases of convictions for perjury for the president to commute. If the president truly believes the sentence is “excessive” (and it was in the mid-range of the sentencing guidelines), then he should be willing to commute the sentences of others, not just Libby.

2) increased investigations, hearings, and research into the Plame case and the underlying situation: the so-called “case” for the invasion of Iraq. This administration must be brought before the law for its actions.

3) The option of impeachment to be placed on the table. Why you removed it in the first place, I have no idea. If the actions of this administration aren’t impeachable, then nothing ever is, or will be.

Respectfully,

Mr. S.

If you’re one of my occasional right-wing visitors, you’ll either snicker at this or attempt to defend the actions of this administration. If you’re apathetic about all this, you shouldn’t be. The rule of law is one of the things that distinguishes this country from many others. If you agree with me, contact the scofflaws at 1600 Pennsylvania here. Dash off a note to Pelosi here. If you know who your Congressional representatives are, find their information and contact them first thing in the morning. It’s time to start reminding the executive and legislative branches who they work for.